Another New Year's Resolution
By David Roche
We are already a few months into 2009 and spring is upon us. Here's a question you may want to ask yourself: how are you doing with your New Year’s resolution? Yes, I wanted to lose weight too but there may be more important resolutions that you can make even now - resolutions that can have a permanent effect on the most important relationship of your life.
Have you noticed that most of us make the same resolutions every year because we never quite achieve the resolution from the previous year? Last year I suggested that you eliminate all negativity in your relationship (in fact, you would be amazed how all relationships can be transformed if you eliminate all negativity).
When I suggest eliminating all negativity, I don’t just mean eliminating criticism (or that famous “constructive criticism”, as if there was such a thing), I mean all negativity: negative acts, negative words, negative thoughts. No more shaming, blaming, criticizing, devaluing, putting-down, inattention, condescension or the silent treatment. Try replacing negativity with acknowledgement, acceptance, appreciation, adoration and advocacy of your partner’s 'otherness'.
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