Many people go into couples therapy with a simple objective. Change my partner!! Please!

Usually they aren’t looking for a younger model, with fewer wrinkles and a smaller waist-line. They just want their couples counselor to deliver them back the same old partner with some tweaks. Then everything would be great!

Now let’s put aside for a moment the idea that the goal of going to see a couples therapist is to change your partner. Imago couples counseling takes a different perspecitve on that which I can talk about in other posts. Today, I just want to talk in general about the idea of changing anyone, or even changing their opinion.

When I first had marital problems, I hated the idea of seeing a marriage counselor.  Even when my divorce lawyer gave me a card for marriage counseling services I threw it away as soon as possible.  So what was it I had against marriage counselors? In my mind I imagined sitting with my hostile wife [...]